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tell me about it i am still awake at 4 am. i liked to consider it as jet lag than anything else. although the whole of me forbids. something is eating me. but i really dont know what. its always like this. i dont know what. i really dont know what. after reading five people you meet in heaven makes me feel more i dont know what. not only i dont know what, i dont know when. done some thinking. febe is right. i am a taker. i take everything you would give and i dont give anything in return. not that i dont want, i cant. damn the melancholy that plagues capricons. i need a new life. out and away. i need new friends. friends that are my kind of people. people who understand without me really saying anything more than a raised eyebrow. friends like the aminos but in my school. i am not dependant. but its not about being dependant or not. its about being gregarious. there is this certain need to be around people. not about loneliness because i am emotionally isolated anyway. now i get what jun told me not too long ago. i think this is the side effect of being in one school too long. you go out, meet new people. it takes time to establish that connection and understanding. it doesnt come all that naturally no matter how much chemistry you have. and i am exhausted at doing exactly that. sick and tired of having to communicate. i want to call it quits. maybe i should have joined gg in tp. at least it looks interesting. then again, maybe. i miss you steph. i really do. 5:14 am powered by blogger |
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